Really Venus? You Needed to Show Your Whole Ass? Even The Crack?

So OK, let’s talk about the Venus thing. And “the thing” would be her ass. For this 2010 French Open, Roland Garros, Venus has designed and chosen to ear a black lace outfit. In and of itself THAT is not the problem-it’s the underpants, the “lollipop.” Basically, it’s ass colored. Now earlier this year for the Australian Open show were some brown underpants too but that pair had a more distinctive un-Venus color and the seemed a little thicker and less skintight. This current pair is Goddamned insane! It’s SOO tight and SOOO exact in it’s color match.

She released a statement when the ton of press came out saying she wanted to convey the “illusion of bareness.” So let’s get to the meat of this piece; Why? WHO on God’s green Earth wants to show people their naked ass. WHY would ANY human walk around in an outfit that shows their ass, let alone a FAMOUS person at a an event with thousand of live viewers and MILLIONS of worldwide viewers. WHY. She’s already famous, already rich, already the 2nd best ranked player in the WORLD. Does she think her “fashion line” needs promotion? And if a designer put something like that out there WHO would want to buy it.

OK, let me calm down and backtrack a little. It’s no secret I’ve written about a dozen articles on this blog and LONG forum comments out there on the web about the William sisters. I’ve been watching their careers for maybe 12 years and I’ve seen them play live, so I feel I have some understanding of of their place in women’s tennis. Next. I know ass. I’m an avowed and well known “ass man.” I built a whole website dedicated to ass! So I’m the LAST person to want less ass out there in the public space-but there’s a time and place.

And by doing this she has now joined her sister in permanently tainting her career. As you know they have both been treated for the bulk of their career with both overt and subtle demeaning statements and attitudes. But last year Serena “showed her ass” by cursing out a lineswoman. So now Venus has joined her LITERALLY, by actually showing her ass. The worse part about the underpants is it LOOKS like she has a very dark seem down the middle which gives the “illusion” of her ass crack! Jesus. If it’s not a seem then the wedgie she gives herself EVERY time she serves makes SURE you can see her actual crack. WHO would do that? INTENTIONALLY! Why? Take a look at this Huffington Post pictures.

Williams Winners at Australian Open 2010 in Doubles

Last year I wrote about the Australian Open and joined it to the topic of how awful SNL was at the time. This year I’m just going to focus on the William sisters. So first let’s kick it off with a photo. Bam! There you go.

Ok, so now that we’ve had a few seconds to bask in their glory let’s get dirty. The FIRST thing we should probably mention is Serena’s year ending 2009; the US Open. I have a LOT to say about that and I STILL haven’t said a word, because my hard drive with all the multiple articles I wrote but didn’t publish is still of commission. So I wont go into it, per se, but it is an issue that’s been hovering in the background of Serena’s Australian Open performance. Certainly the newscasters have found a way to weave it into every discussion.

But realistically Serena DID start the AO off by playing her ass off. Something like 31 games won in a row. And then it stopped. She hit a WALLLLL. I mean all of a sudden it’s like the bottom fell out. Her next 2 games were brutal. Watching her play this 20 year old from Belarus (Azarenka) was rugged and a lesson in mortality. All I could think was “that’s a 20 year playing a 29 year old and MAN it looks like it.” Azarenka is this little boned lithe white girl and Serena looked like a heavy weight boxer. Now, I have spoken at great lengths about how much I love S’s body. I mean I LOVE it. But she’s “robust.” I mean let’s be honest, AND she seems to have gotten denser, not fatter, just DENSE. And where before her rear was the notable thing, now her boobs have become these heavy JUGGS.

So watching her play, and beat, both Azarenka and Na Li from China you could just see how much more she’s got to move around. Compounded by the fact that her legs were in these excessive straps and she FELL LIKE 4 TIMES. And watching her get up, you just knew those falls were taking a toll. An older person toll. Those 2 matches were shocking because she won. The day before Na Li had beat Venus and it wasn’t really a shocker. It happened. I wasn’t happy but it happened. And STILL they were playing doubles. The day Serena played Na Li she somehow went and played doubles.

So if it sounds like I’m saying close the book on these two (things I’ve kinda hinted at in the past) I’m not. I still see them calling it a wrap in singles in the next 2 years or so. But not this year. Serena’s will to win is really unmatched. Nobody, I mean nobody, can touch it. She’ll be playing Henin in about 8 hours and it will really come down to Serena’s body vs her will.

Jan 30th Update; She won

Serena Pretty Much Headlined the 2009 French Open. But Let’s Be Honest They Don’t Like Her

So a couple of days ago I read something a guy named Couch wrote. The premise of his piece was that Serena Williams should “do more.” In his mind she’s not fit and not committed tennis. So I wrote a response that’s pretty much going to get buried amongst the barrage of livid racist who can’t stand somebody Black playing tennis anyway let alone somebody they can villianize because she has the unmitigated gall to be confident.

Pam Shriver is quoted in a piece for the LA times this week where she says the obvious. The French Open has been repeatedly miserable to Serena. And the speculation is that maybe it’s not racist since the French have Gael Monfils and maybe it’s not anit-American since they love Roddick. But A) Gael is a a FRENCH Black person and they’ll root for anybody that can put France on the map for tennis. B) Roddick is a (white) man. Case closed on that one. In fact the ONLY person being heckled with nasty comments and repeatedly having officials ignore blatant cheating is Serena.What I wrote in response is below…

gael

Serena’s not fit? Compared to whom? Look, Couch, I don’t know you; I’ve never read anything you’ve written, but the story title caught my eye. So I don’t know if you’re a former tennis pro, a sports writer in general or just some dude who got a job at a website and assigned to this part of the site. But I’ve been watching women’s tennis since 1999, and even I feel I can make a better assessment of what’s going on than you.

Waaaaayyy back a year and a half ago I wrote a piece about the slump BOTH Williams were going through and either on my own blog or in a comment I made on somebody else’s blog I predicted they were probably on a downward spiral.

But NOT for the reasons you’ve indicated; fitness and commitment. That’s absurd. I mean have you really listened to what you’ve said? Serena’s strength is so apparent that she does not even LOOK like a tennis player. The irony is that I thought she looked about 10 pounds lighter than I’m used to seeing her for the French open. But the Williams in general are SO fit no American can even compete anymore. It took a flood of Eastern Europeans, people coming from poor parts of Europe, to be able to be able to match the physicality of the Williams. The French had to go back to the drawing board (Mauresmo) and the Belgian just dropped out (Clijsters) and one by one the other Americans have receding into obscurity.

My belief for the REAL reason for the Serena (and Venus) slump is not about commitment so much as it is about home life. When their parents got divorced and their sister got killed that broke their momentum, and they haven’t recovered. Richard (their father for those of you not up to speed) pretty much handed over coaching duties and their mother took over for a while. He wasn’t even at games as often. And I just think it’s a case of diminishing returns unless something drastic changes.

As for this issue of sponsorship money. Well let’s not kid ourselves. It’s a Black issue. Case closed. No need to harp on it. But the guy you interviewed, Bob Williams, ironically located here in FANTASTICALLY racist Chicago saying 50 percent of endorsement deals go to Black people should be corrected to “men athletes.” Yeah, Black GUYS make a lot of dough in “traditionally Black player dominated” sports. There is no Black man making a killing in hockey. So the Serena is fighting two uphill battles; women not making as much as men, and being the “wrong” race for her sport. The ad agencies are essentially not in a mood to sell Black Barbies to little white girls not when they’ve got an IDEAL candidate in Sharapova WHO ONLY WON A FEW slams compared to Serena. Because that was the other argument right? “Serena doesn’t win enough” Ha! In addition, sponsorship deals are not necessarily tied to winning as much as DRAW. The Williams have drawn more viewers to TV, more worldwide fans to the game and sold more tennis seats than anybody in the last 10 years. FACT.

I’m also noticing a lot of people talking about how “arrogant” Serena is. How she’s needs to “do it, not say it.” Well, all you fat ass people sitting at your computer’s look ridiculous. Have any of YOU ever won a Grand Slam? Even one? Come on, surely you MUST have done something to be so full of attitude. And man, how short people’s memories are. Does anybody remember Muhammad Ali most famous saying? Oh that’s right it was “I’m the Greatest!” Or let’s look at Jimmy Connors, or John McEnroe. NONE of these guys were shy and demur-whether they wore winning or LOSING about how they were the “best.” It’s unusual for a woman to do it and there are so few Black women tennis players that, YES, she pumps herself up. Who can fault her when she’s been repeatedly cheated at the French, called all kinds of names, AND had to deal with those “objective” people in the booth talking about her and her sister negatively whenever they get a chance. I mean, Mary Jo and the others were SO easy to make backhanded compliments for YEARS until the Williams winning streak could no longer be denied. So surprise, surprise Serena decides to be her OWN number one fan AND number one critic to get herself to the top. To NOT be a braggart is, frankly, kinda UNAmerican. Anybody remember a certain flight suited dude standing in front of a Mission Accomplished banner?