Tag Archives: williams

Venus Puts on Sweater and Loses French Open. Nervous About Network Viewers?

So Venus just lost the match. And look at this bulky ass-hiding sweater she put on. So was she self conscious? I talked to my mom about the game before it started and we had a long talk about WHY she had done that to her career. I just wrote about it yesterday. My mom doesn’t have cable or sat TV so this was going to be her first chance to see “the dress.” Then we talked after the game happened because two things were going on.


1) Venus (and Petrova) were both wearing bulky gear. It looked like a cool day out there so it made sense

2) The camera men were CLEARLY being very generous to Venus and not showing her ass to American viewers. I mean NONE of the shots were close-ups or from behind or  ground level. NONE. All the shots were long distance.

So my mom thought Venus looked very self conscious and was going to loose the game. And that’s what happened. But that’s the traditional it seems for women tennis players during a major; they pick and outfit and stick with it for the whole run. So she HAD to wear it because to stop wearing would mean she caved in to the pressure and realized she had made a mistake. So the crappy weather saved her “ass.”

My argument was that IF she was going to be worried it would have came out somewhere int he last 6 days-but maybe mom was right, up until today it’s been on cable. Either way she looked totally distracted and out of it.

But let’s go back to that pre-game talk. I got REALLY agitated because we as black people are SO self destructive and when you look at what Serena did with cursing out that official, Tiger did with his whores, and Venus did with this ass-showing outfit it’s ALL so self defeating. All three of them achieved TOP positions in “white sports” and held their positions for a long time. I mean let’s be honest, people expect “black” behavior from basketball and football players. But those 3 had great careers, had clean personas and then within a period of about 9 months took nose dives. And the worse part is they had examples of what NOT to do. When Serena did her thing Tiger should have said, maybe I should get my act together. And Venus has Serena AND Tiger to look as terrible examples of choices.

And they all willingly did these things. Nobody put them in this situations, they just tainted their careers permanently. The actions they took will always be linked to their achievements.

Really Venus? You Needed to Show Your Whole Ass? Even The Crack?

So OK, let’s talk about the Venus thing. And “the thing” would be her ass. For this 2010 French Open, Roland Garros, Venus has designed and chosen to ear a black lace outfit. In and of itself THAT is not the problem-it’s the underpants, the “lollipop.” Basically, it’s ass colored. Now earlier this year for the Australian Open show were some brown underpants too but that pair had a more distinctive un-Venus color and the seemed a little thicker and less skintight. This current pair is Goddamned insane! It’s SOO tight and SOOO exact in it’s color match.

She released a statement when the ton of press came out saying she wanted to convey the “illusion of bareness.” So let’s get to the meat of this piece; Why? WHO on God’s green Earth wants to show people their naked ass. WHY would ANY human walk around in an outfit that shows their ass, let alone a FAMOUS person at a an event with thousand of live viewers and MILLIONS of worldwide viewers. WHY. She’s already famous, already rich, already the 2nd best ranked player in the WORLD. Does she think her “fashion line” needs promotion? And if a designer put something like that out there WHO would want to buy it.

OK, let me calm down and backtrack a little. It’s no secret I’ve written about a dozen articles on this blog and LONG forum comments out there on the web about the William sisters. I’ve been watching their careers for maybe 12 years and I’ve seen them play live, so I feel I have some understanding of of their place in women’s tennis. Next. I know ass. I’m an avowed and well known “ass man.” I built a whole website dedicated to ass! So I’m the LAST person to want less ass out there in the public space-but there’s a time and place.

And by doing this she has now joined her sister in permanently tainting her career. As you know they have both been treated for the bulk of their career with both overt and subtle demeaning statements and attitudes. But last year Serena “showed her ass” by cursing out a lineswoman. So now Venus has joined her LITERALLY, by actually showing her ass. The worse part about the underpants is it LOOKS like she has a very dark seem down the middle which gives the “illusion” of her ass crack! Jesus. If it’s not a seem then the wedgie she gives herself EVERY time she serves makes SURE you can see her actual crack. WHO would do that? INTENTIONALLY! Why? Take a look at this Huffington Post pictures.

The ONLY Reason I Know About ANY Women Tennis Players is Serena

Listen, I’m not gonna lie I’m an ass man. So I only know about tennis at ALL because of Serena’s big and POWERFUL ass. It does look like it could do things, right? Like crush cans, or pick up marbles or maybe allow her to walk without using her legs! Just butt-cheek walking. But I hung around and watched the games. In fact I’ve put in nearly ten YEARS of watching the women’s games (and some men games). But, as you probably already know; the men’s game goes like this; hotshot wins for a long time followed by another hotshot who wins all the time. And it’ll take 3 to 4 hours to do it. So it’s a boring, unsexy, waste of time. Time I don’t have. So I started watching women’s tennis. And you know, almost unanimously they’re all good looking and you can expect something weird to happen. Like the awesome Hantuchova’s break down, or the Hingis stabbing, or the risqué modeling of Kournikova, or the flat out upcoming Playboy spread with Harkleroad. Plus they play tennis too, somewhere in there. Seriously I DO watch the tennis part too.Check out the photo…

And I DO remember seeing Venus on the local news when she was a little girl and people talking about “stars of tomorrow.” She was playing and these beads were swinging around. But I didn’t think much of it. Then those late 90’s US Opens happened and I saw her grown up and it was like watching Jordan (and I don’t even LIKE basketball). But to see somebody so fluid and so skilled and at the time WAY more “fit” looking than anybody playing the game was just mesmerizing. And that was it; women’s tennis took off, and became something. Women’s basketball I’m sure is praying for a similar moment. And as time has gone on, women’s tennis has even shown up in weird places like today’s episode of the popular cartoon Ben 10. I call this image “Ben Tennis.”

Do I harbor a dream that I’ll one day be able to get my hands on that chunky ass? Oh yeah. And YES, I know that she and her sister have primarily, if not EXCLUSIVELY, been sighted only with white men, and YES I know they’ll both probably end up with white men. But that’s not a surprise, most successful black women are going white, in fact most successful women are going white (don’t even get me started on the Asian woman thing!). But check it, I’m currently getting internet RICH and I’ve got a movie on the way so there is a REMOTE chance for a love connection! Plus right now she’s supposed to be with fellow Chicagoan, fellow black man and fellow big ass lover Common.

serenaASS

IN a post not TOO long ago I talked about Serena’s abysmal loss at the hands of somebody she should NOT have lost to, and yet here we are again with both sisters losing EARLY at Roland Garros. I go to visit my friends tennis themed blog and VENUS is out! Then I read yesterday’s news that SERENA is out too. And I’m like-what? They’re both out already? I mean I feel like I just dropped somebody off at the stadium and said I’m going to park the car, stop by the concession stand and I’ll meet you. But then I get to my seat and people are walking out. It’s over. It’s over! I really can’t believe they’re BOTH done already. So this is it. I’ve been tentative and hinting but this is it. They’re done.

The obvious thing that a bunch of writers and tennis pros talk about is all the glitz and glam being a major source of distraction. But I put it to you Your Honor that that stuff is the symptom . The disease is that their sister died, and their parents got divorced. No core, no tennis. They had momentum, they had foundation, they had a system. Out the window. In the Williams family it’s become a far more fractured team effort. It’s not quite every (wo)man for him/herself. But I don’t think it’s as much about everybody being focused on the two tennis stars being number one anymore. The money, the properties around the world, the various households, the split opinions about how their careers should go, the individual interests and personal goals are just all over the map without the family being on stable ground.

I have talked on my friend’s blog about tennis about the women in tennis having a short life expectancy. It is just a flat out fact that we can pretty much expect a rise, a height of play and then a decline that goes from about 15 years old to around 25. And after 25 you’re going to see a waning ability to win followed by a surprise retirement. EVERY single woman that retires is a surprise tennis fans. In the last 5 years I’ve watched one player after another leave the game and all the commentators express their disbelief that it’s happening. The pattern is quite clear; a new group of players hit the scene that makes them have to try harder, they meet some guy and/or want to have a baby, they get hurt and that’s it. They leave the game. I’ve only been watching since 1999 or so I see it. How can anybody else NOT see it?

Prognosis; both Williams will “shock” the tennis world and leave within 2 years. I don’t want it to happen, but what else can happen? They keep claiming that THIS time they’re serious about the game and not distracted by all their projects. They even show up to the matches without injury and in good shape AND STILL LOOSE. So they’re done. The 10 year cycle has run. I and probably lots of others hoped for a long career, but they burned bright and burned out fast.