TLC is Good to Me and DMV is Bad to Me

What the heck am I doing? I guess writing the old blog. I’ve easily got a hundred “posts” ideas I could write up, but I only get inspired when I look at my declining Alexa number. It took a few months but it’s going fast now. OK! So here are some recent events. Last week we had the usual spike in numbers due to one of my 3 TLC (The Learning Channel) articles. I guess it was about a year ago that station ran some pretty horrific medical oddity stories. I think the series is called My Shocking Story or something like that. So since that time whenever the show (anywhere in the world) my little blog has this explosion of traffic. Well, these days the traffic is nowhere as big as it used to be but still not bad. I guess the show about the Man with No Face aired and here\’s what the stats look like.stats

Also from last week was the very large deal of getting a Driver’s license from the state of Illinois. Why a big deal? Well, see my Cali license expired on my birthday about 6 weeks back, and the big question was if I was going to go back to LA or maybe even San Fran to get a new on. The wouldn’t let me do it online because my previous license was a replacement for one I lost and now they FINGERPRINT you as part of the process and wanted me to make a live appearance. But the big question was; where was I going to live? I mean I’ve been in Chicago now OVER 3 years by a few months, and its the city of my birth and were my mother is-but is it home? And is LA home? I mean i plan all this film stuff for my career, but I’m 41 now. FORTY ONE. I’ve been at this “career” 20 years now. Well one things for certain; I do still have most of my stuff in a storage unit in the Valley. But I also have a whole house full of stuff in my place out here. In fact I actually OWN a house out there-that’s why I also registered to vote out here at the DMV instead of absentee in Cali.

Anyway getting the license was 9 kinds of hell. 10 AM to 6 PM. Some of that was because I wasn’t going to give them my Cali license (so things will be smooth when I do finally go back, and I like the picture). But the main reason was mechanical. Here’s how the day went: 10 AM I showed up with all my paperwork thinking all I would have to do is prove who I was and that I had had a license before. The first line is an mandatory info line that you can be sorted and sent to the right place. I did that for half an hour then was sent to a sitting area where they called A-E numbers randomly, like A67, C71, B01 etc. Next I made it to the desk and they gave me an on the spot eye exam. (right eye is so bad I could only confirm that something was on the chart). I was then told I had to take both the written AND the driving test. Had to go outside and get my insurance proof. Then sent to pay (10 dollars). I was told I could study. I took the loaner book and spent half an hour. 4 wrong, but enough to pass. Go outside, get the truck and bring it around the cars in a line. The guy in front of me HITS THE CAR in from of him. Security guy comes out and tells him its over, just leave. I get up to the spot, and they have me test my horn, blinkers and brake lights. Brake lights don’t work. I’m shocked, but sort of not (hit and run accident a month ago destroyed parts of the car). I go inside and get a receipt and am told I can return later to finish.

I go home work on the lights, neighbor confirms they work. Go BACK to the DMV, the line again-but I can skip some parts. Get BACK to the car test part, they tell me the lights don’t work again. This time I’ve got a few tools and decide to fix the lights in the parking lot. Work for an hour. 2 ladies pull up next to me and ask about an auto store, turns out their blinker bulb is out. I tell them I’d like to tag along to a store I know. We go, I get their bulb in. They decide NOT to let me take the driving test using their car when we return. I decide to loiter and ask people. I finally tell a guy I’ll give him some money, and he lets me use his car since I can’t get my brake lights working at all (12 dollars, I notice when I get in his gas is on empty and the little warning light is coming on). I took the test finally, but it really WAS a test since I was in a strange car that is NOT a stick shift like I’ve been driving for the last 15 years. And I take a big toothy smiling photo that contradicts the stress of the day and finally leave to fix my grandfathers phones and later my mothers internet.